On my couch one night, scrolling through the social medias, a video caught my attention. There, on my iPhone, was a woman of color, a woman of size, practicing yoga. Her poses weren’t perfect. Her flow was not graceful. Yet she unabashedly honored herself, her practice, and the ability of anybody (any BODY) to do yoga. I immediately followed her Instagram account and realized, not only did she practice yoga, she taught yoga.

“You could teach yoga,” my heart said.

My brain responded, “Umm, yea, no.”

From this one yogi’s Instagram account, I began to follow a dozen or so other women who ranged in ethnicity and sizes. As a woman in my 30s, of a size that is frequently not carried in stores, these images and videos of women inspired me. So much so, that I returned to practicing yoga after some time of not practicing any physical activity.

This return was a reminder of how frustrated I was by my inability to pose perfectly. Except this time, I realized perfection wasn’t the goal. Rather, the goal was to practice. The women on Instagram, who know nothing about me or my existence in the world,continued to inspire me to take classes. The progress I made on the mat during my practice continued to inspire me to take classes.

In a moment during which my brain got on board with my heart, I searched online for yoga teacher training in Maine. When my brain registered the bottom line, I closed all the open tabs related to yoga teacher training. However, a funny thing happens when your heart and your brain meet on the same page in agreement.

I couldn’t let the idea go.

I started casually mentioning it to people in conversation. Their responses were positive. No, they didn’t think it was a crazy idea. Then Samudra announced it would be offering Fluid Yoga teacher training starting in November. I attended the info session.  I asked all the questions I could ask. My brain was still freaked out by the investment, but my heart stated its case. I spent all of my 20s not doing things I wanted to because of cost. Training to be a yoga teacher was not just another investment in education, but an investment in myself, an opportunity to grow in mind, body, and spirit.

“Are we doing this?” pleaded my heart.

And my brain relented, “Yes, we have to do this.”

So here I am, a yogi in training.

Emma has been a member of Samudra since June 2017. She writes for Samudra’s blog, and Sarah has graciously permitted Emma to document her journey  to becoming a certified yoga teacher. Stay tuned for monthly updates through the completion of her 200 hours in April. Teacher training begins this November in a module format – space is still available for those interested. 

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